Ident Problem

I have a question, I normally use the FTP program SmartFTP and for awhile i couldnt
get my Ident to work while connecting to my friends FTP, it would always give me

[L] 530 "*@this.is.my.ip" is not valid for the account specified.
(this.is.my.ip would be my IP)

and than I opened my linksys settings and opened port 113 and the port of the FTP
site, and than make suer the email was set to safetm3@yaada.com and the Ident as
"safetm3" And it just worked out of nowhere, and now it comes that its not working
now and I Have no idea what the hell it is, i've tried 4 different programs to try
and connect with the ident, i've checked the port forwarding settings, i've tried
everything does anybody know the reason why it wont connect as

safetm3@this.is.my.ip?

please i need help, im about to boot my computer out of the window, it just wont
work with me, am i doing anything wrong or soemthing i need to check? please help
=/

nobody can help me with my ident problem? i cant seem to find help anywhere? and i love using smart ftp, or maybe can somebody explain how ident works, so than i can maybe fix my problem, or the source or anyuthing ahhhhhhhhhh :? :?